etben: flowers and sky (rl: yes but wait what)
so for reasons that do not need any goddamn exploring, I just backread, um, the first two years of my LJ? (Which, ahahahahahaha oh god, bb!self, you were SO TRANSPARENT about SO MANY THINGS.) Whatever, it's been grand, I found the first comment [livejournal.com profile] soundslikej ever left me, n'awwwww.

And, like, whatever, hop on the 2:02 bus down Nostalgia Lane - but what really struck me was that all of the stuff I was dealing with then? It's the same stuff I'm dealing with now, in slightly different window dressing. I worry about being Enough, about Accomplishing Things; I remain (moderately) convinced that I have no worth except in the things I do, and therefore (sort of) believe that I don't deserve good things unless I am doing something good myself. Which - there's a level on which that is super upsetting and sad, I guess - I will always be like this! I will never get better! - but at the same time, idk, somehow it's a little comforting? Like, yeah, this will always be my tendency, and I'll live with it, and that will be fine. I will always be short and chubby and nearsighted and sarcastic and striving to be kinder and more patient with myself. There are worse things to be!

I was trying to articulate this to J, which led to the following conversation:

M: Like, this was the fight I was having with myself at 19, and this will be the fight I will be having with myself at 90.
J: Yup!
M: I'm just saying, when it comes time for me to retire, you had better fucking brace yourself, because I am going to be an actual human disaster. Like, I'll be asleep for the first week, and then I'll spend the second week reading, and then the third week I will be a fucking nightmare.
J: So, like every August ever, then?
M: ...shut up.
J: And, like - why would I want to make you retire, anyways?
M: ...because old?
J: Right, okay, so you'll stop working, but you'll immediately start volunteering at, like, six different places.
M: ...yes.
J: I have met you, you know.

I am marrying a pretty A+ human being, internet. In case you weren't aware. ♥

resolved

Dec. 31st, 2012 01:01 pm
etben: flowers and sky (rl: yes but wait what)
So last year I made a post about what I wanted to get done in 2012, and today I am in a pensive sort of mood, so here is how I did on those goals:

2012 in review )

So, yeah. That happened. Thanks for being around, internet!
etben: flowers and sky (Default)
Heyyyyy internet!

[livejournal.com profile] soundslikej and I have had a VERY EXCITING Saturday, by which I mean that we mostly puttered around the house and flumped on the couch a lot. BUT! We also did some of the household tasks we've been neglecting, which was exciting. ALL OF THE LAUNDRY EVER: done and folded! Christmas tree needles in the hall (which we've been reminding each other about ALL WEEK and then forgetting anyways): swept up!

But in the process, we realized that we have a problem. Now, I call this problem "If we lived in a civilized state with bottle returns in grocery stores, this wouldn't happen."

Jai calls it OH MY GOD THAT'S A LOT OF BOOZE. )

So we made a voyage to Kappy's and returned...almost all of that? Or, no, the bag of cider didn't go, because we knew from sad experience that they wouldn't take it. But the rest of it was recycled for the (measley $.05, wtf is this state up to, where I come from, fnargle bargle) deposit.

...and then we bought some more, because we're great.

Speaking of amusing regional differences, when we went to get our tree, we saw ads for KISSING BALLS. I loled a LOT, but [livejournal.com profile] soundslikej assures me that this is an actual THING around these parts.

This, I am informed, is a Kissing Ball (lol kissing ball) )

...yeah, I'm stuck on KISSING BALLS. Because I am TWELVE, WHAT.

other adventures in regionalisms: frappes (which are...possibly the same as malts? but possibly just milkshakes) and slush (which is kind of like a sno-cone, I guess? but distinct from a slush-ee. IDK, I just thought it was funny that the gas station convenience store was advertising ICE CREAM AND SLUSH.) and, of course, the epic pie debate. Changing states is fun! And educational!
etben: holding hands (<3)
So I'm doing my homework, like I do, and I come across this wonderfully useful diagram:



This schematic drawing of the lateral surface of the human brain shows the regions primarily responsible for recognition.

...yeah. Exactly. Because as a classroom teacher, I am going to have so many opportunities to cut open my students' heads and look at their brains.

I share this with [personal profile] jai, who stares at me intently and says,

"I don't need to cut open your head."



...guys, she is the CREEPIEST PERSON EVER. ♥
etben: holding hands (<3)
First off, MASSIVE FLAILY THANKS to [livejournal.com profile] brooklinegirl, [livejournal.com profile] mrsronweasley, [livejournal.com profile] drlense, [livejournal.com profile] ldthomps, [livejournal.com profile] giddygeek, and [livejournal.com profile] bathsweaver for all of their help with the move yesterday. It was AMAZING and a million times smoother than any of us (or [livejournal.com profile] lordessrenegade and I, at least) had expected, and also FAST LIKE LIGHTNING. THANK YOU ALL.

(ps, one of you left a Red Sox baseball cap on our kitchen table?)

But. Okay. So the thing you have to understand is that in the following pictures, I am TOTALLY INNOCENT.

But. Well. Um. )

AND YET, I am still extremely pleased with this state of affairs! I have put up some shelves in the kitchen cabinets, and put some things ON those shelves, and puttered around ridiculously, and just - APARTMENT. This is my face right now: :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

At some point soon, one of us will post a picspam of the entire process of relocation, and sometime next month I will start CLASSES and want to talk about other things again! ...but not right away, sry2say.
etben: holding hands (<3)
I don't know if I mentioned, but today is the day I leave the Far Frozen North (no, seriously, there was snow on my porch this morning. WTAF?) and hie me down to the big city, where I will collect my GIRL. ♥! And we will have shenanigans and ridiculousness and also a concert with those fellows in Fall Out Boy (I heard that the loud one with all the tattoos loves the short one in the hat). And then I get to drag [personal profile] jai back to the Far Frozen North with me and keep her for a week! \o/

So, you know. If you're looking for me—or her, for that matter—that's where we'll be.
etben: holding hands (<3)
So Jai and I were sitting on the waterfront, as you do, and we noticed that a pigeon was inspecting us. COO, it said. COO.

Clearly, we realized, this was no ordinary pigeon, but in fact Ryan Rosspigeon, come to see how we liked our hotel room. (Conclusion: it is very very gay. Fortunately, so are we!)

This ridiculousness led to us discussing what animals other bandom boys would be, at which point we realized that Mikeyway would, of course, be a rockfish.

[The SF Bay Aquarium has an informational plaque about rockfish, one of the ones with answers to the questions that visitors are supposedly asking. Why aren't the rockfish moving?, it asked, and went on to explain that rockfish stay very very still, pretending to be rocks. Apparently this has something to do with them finding stuff to eat? IDK, I've never found that pretending to be a rock does a lot for me on the food front, but then again I don't live underwater.

ANYWAYS. The rockfish don't move, is the point.]

Me: So, wait, does that mean that all rockfish are secretly Mikeyway?
Jai: Yes! Mikeyway is the last cylon! [NOTE: This is not true.]
Me: There are many copies, and they have a plan!
Jai: No they don't! They sit around and pretend to be ROCKS!
Me: ...I never said it was a good plan.

In conclusion, a rockfish. :| )
etben: holding hands (<3)
I CAN HAS GIRL.

brb, being ridiculous.
etben: flowers and sky (rl: lesbianism is awesome)
I love [livejournal.com profile] lordessrenegade. BEST ENABLER EVER.

etben: flowers and sky (my breath in your lungs)
you know, it's really amazing how a good meal and some good news can make the world a better place to be.

*beams quietly*

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